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David Harbour Opens Up About Becoming a Stepfather and His Past Reluctance Toward Having Kids
Before finding love with singer Lily Allen in 2019, actor David Harbour had firmly established a child-free lifestyle. His perspective, however, underwent a dramatic shift when he married Lily Allen
Before he crossed paths with Lily Allen in 2019, David Harbour had a notion of a future where he just lived happily childless. Literally, that changed following his marriage to Lily, performed by Elvis in Las Vegas in 2020, when he became the stepdad to her two daughters, Ethel, now 12, and Marnie, now 11, from her previous marriage to Sam Cooper.
The family has since moved to Brooklyn, New York. It appears as though David took quite a liking to being a stepdad, with posts on Instagram capturing the moments he shares with the girls, such as when they attended a Taylor Swift concert. She often speaks lovingly on her podcast, "Miss Me?", about how involved David is with the children — including the time he packed their bags for summer camp and drove them from New York to Boston when Lily's flight home was delayed at the last minute.
Though they're all close now, he has admitted it wasn't always easy with his stepdaughters. He once recalled an incident in which Ethel became upset and said, "He's not our dad, he's not our dad," with Marnie seemingly more confused and asking what he was to them. "The older one got very upset with that, which I understand, and said: 'He's not our dad, he's not our dad,'" David said. "And the younger one was like: 'Well, what is he? He's kind of our dad? "He's kinda like our stepdad?
' And the older one said: 'He's just some guy in our lives."
The sweet moment stuck with David, who jokingly admitted it made him feel he HAD to propose to Lily, referring to it as his "favorite thing I've ever been called." Luckily, when the time came for David to pop the question, Ethel and Marnie were more than game for the proposal, with Ethel even encouraging him to "do it.".
Recently, David has shared more of his relationship with his stepdaughters and the emotional moment the first time they met. During an episode of "Miss Me?", he had a candid chat regarding his experience of being a stepfather with her best friend and co-host Miquita Oliver. He shared that being a stepdad was "the most surprising thing I've done, and enjoyable thing".
David said he never thought of himself as a father, having lived the life of an artist full of creative pursuits and adventures which did not particularly merge well with fatherhood. He further said that being his family's last male line, he was satisfied with ending his bloodline. "I never wanted kids," he said, reminiscing on his earlier days, and how meeting Lily and her daughters changed his mind altogether. He recalled very clearly the first time he met them at The Wolseley in London and said he was very nervous but developed a deep affection for the young ladies. The connection was spontaneous, as he described how their innocent faces conquered his heart.
"There was just this sort of instant type of love that I had for them that was so different," he said, adding that they were only 6 and 7 years old then.
After he showed his renewed love for his stepdaughters, David concluded the interview by mentioning that this had made him accept the idea of a "pre-made family." This means freedom from the usual pressures of being a real father figure to take care of raising these kids. For him, it is like family—well, sort of, a readymade family—just accepting one's place in their lives by helping them grow and enjoying small things in life.
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