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INTERVIEW: Holland on Number Boy, hate crime experience, supporting ZEROBASEONE’s Kim Jiwoong
Korean soloist Holland exclusively spoke to Pinkvilla about being recognized as "someone who has a million followers" rather than "the first gay idol to come out."
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Soloist Holland spoke to Pinkvilla about latest release Number Boy.
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The Korean singer talked about his decision to feature Kim Jiwoong in song and their friendship
South Korean singer Holland, whose real name is Go Tae Seob, made his debut in 2018. Since then, Holland has become known as the first openly gay K-pop idol, who plans on expressing himself through his music. After several attempts to land in a Korean entertainment company for his debut, Holland decided to release his songs on his own. In the process, he found support and love from his fans who appreciated his honesty.
About Holland
The soloist has continued to put out raw music, detailing his thoughts and running over his emotions as a person of sexual minority, with the visuals heavily relying on his own experiences or those of others around him. His singles Neverland, I'm Not Afraid, I'm So Afraid, Nar_C, and Loved You Better, accompanied by music videos, frame his discography.
Previously, in May 2022, Holland shared his experience of a homophobic attack against him in the Itaewon area of Seoul, South Korea, when he called it a 'hate crime'. He was injured and shared photos of the assault on his social media, displaying what he called the 'sad reality of LGBT+ human rights'. In the same posts, he wished for 'love and hope' in place of 'hate and violence' for LGBTQ+ people.
During an exclusive conversation with Pinkvilla, Holland spoke about his latest release, single album 'Number Boy', in which he stars opposite actor and singer Kim Jiwoong with whom he co-starred in the Korean BL web series 'Ocean Like Me', and more.
Interview with Holland
When did you start working on 'Number Boy'?
Holland: I started working on the song last August. I started with the question: What is the most honest story I want to tell right now? I've been writing songs about whatever I want to talk about at the time.
I was inspired by my relationship with my boyfriend at the time. I was at a point where I questioned whether he was in love with me or the numbers I had.
The music video starts with a scene where you can be seen lying down and nobody seems to be helping you but instead, they start recording you. Did this stem from a personal experience?
Holland: I wanted to express the way everyone looked at me strangely, as if they were looking at an alien, rather than what I actually experienced.
We shot in Itaewon, which is a symbolic LGBTQ+ neighborhood in Korea. It's a neighborhood that I love and that gives me a sense of security, but at the same time, it's also a place where I was the victim of a hate crime. I wanted to capture different messages in the film considering these things.
The song sees you walking through a narrative that you cannot be separated from "numbers," those possibly being the followers, likes, views and more. Do you feel as a public figure, people perceive you more as a number in this time and age, rather than a person or an artist?
Holland: In the end, I think it's the numbers that make me a public figure. As an artist, numbers are the most obvious way to evaluate a person's value, and I suddenly felt that when people look at me, they don't recognize me as "the first gay idol to come out," but as "someone who has a million followers." But I don't think that's a bad thing. I'm used to evaluating things by numbers, and I'm sure people are too. And I don't think I'm alone in this. I think it's something that every artist goes through.
We see you glimmering towards the end of the music video with wounds of where your wings would have been. How do you wish people would interpret that?
Holland: I'm curious how people interpreted it. First of all, I wanted to show that I'm an angel. Since the music video starts with Holland losing his wings and falling to earth, and at the end, I wanted to show him saved.
I don't really want to tell you the details of the story. I want people to watch my music video and make their own interpretations.
Who came up with the idea of casting actor and singer Kim Jiwoong in the music video? Why did you pick him?
Holland: The people in the music video are all close friends of mine. In fact, the music video schedule changed a lot, and there were a lot of issues before filming, but once the final date was fixed, there was no time until the day of filming.
So, I cast Jiwoong, who I thought could play the role the best. I didn't consider any other options. We had worked together on a drama not too long ago, so we'd been in frequent contact since then.
What was your experience like working with Kim Jiwoong on this music video? What did you think about Kim Jiwoong’s acting?
Holland: The filming was delayed a lot, so I made Jiwoong wait for about an hour. I felt so bad that I decided to treat him to an expensive meal. Also, all the crew complimented him on how handsome he was.
Jiwoong is younger than me, but he has more experience than me. So, he has better aspects than me in many ways. He is also naturally good-looking. Even when we were acting together, he was gentle. I thought he would be popular in the future, and I'm so glad that he got such a good opportunity and became famous.
Are you supporting him for his debut on Boys Planet?
Holland: I actually haven't watched Boys Planet yet. I think the format of the program is too cruel. It's hard to watch so many young kids survive to pursue their dreams. I know how desperate they are.
Still, I have to watch Jiwoong, so I always watch the clips. I thought he did so well, and I'm so relieved that he finally made his final debut. I was nervous and always checked the rankings. The numbers... are so tiring.
Working in this industry and especially last year has not been easy for you. How does one recover from such incidents and how did you personally recover?
Holland: I don't think I'm over it. I'm just living with a lot of scars and a lot of hard realities. I just do it because it's what I do, and I want to get to a higher level. I try not to think about it too much. I know why I'm doing this, and I think that's what keeps me going. I envision a time in the future when I've reached my goal when I'll be able to laugh about all the mishaps.
What would you like fans to take away from 'Number Boy'?
Holland: I said I would try to have a higher number, but I wish my fans didn't. It's ironic because I want them to find out what they're worth and not get hung up on numbers, and I want to tell them that you're already special even if you don't have a high number.
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