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Mallika Sherawat says her mother went into depression after her birth, was called ‘bojh’: ‘Mere parivaar me maatam chaa gaya tha’
Mallika Sherawat opened up about being seen as a 'bojh' in her family, revealing that her mother slipped into depression after her birth and her family was disappointed over having a daughter.
Trigger warning: This article contains mentions of depression.
Mallika Sherawat recently reflected on her challenging childhood and revealed that her mother went into depression after her birth. She shared that her arrival was met with sadness in her family, saying, “When I was born, mere pariwaar mein maatam chhaa gaya tha,” highlighting the deep-rooted biases. She also recounted how her family viewed daughters as a burden, questioning, “Ladkiyon ka kya hai? They will get married; they are a liability, ek bojh hai.”
In an interview with Hauterrfly, Mallika Sherawat revealed that her arrival was greeted with disappointment, highlighting the pervasive patriarchy in her family. She recalled that her birth was met with mourning, and she believes her mother was profoundly affected, likely slipping into depression as a result.
"When I was born mere pariwaar mein maatam chhaa gaya tha (there was mourning in my family). My mother, I am sure, went into depression, poor thing," she said. This reaction underscores the societal preference for sons over daughters that she faced from the very beginning.
She further reflected on her journey without support from her family, highlighting how neither of her parents stood by her. She also discussed how, like many families, hers upheld patriarchal values that restricted her choices and freedom. Mallika pointed out that women themselves often contribute to reinforcing these societal norms, stating that while men's treatment of women is one issue, the way women treat each other is equally significant. She remarked that women often limit each other by adhering to patriarchal rules, instead of helping to break those barriers.
Reflecting on her childhood, The actress recalled the stark favoritism her parents showed towards her brother, which left her deeply saddened. She explained how, as a child, she couldn't understand why her parents treated her differently, but now it’s clear to her.
Her parents prioritized her brother's education and future, believing that the family's wealth and resources should be invested in him. According to them, daughters were considered a liability who would eventually get married, making them less deserving of such investments. This deeply rooted patriarchal mindset shaped much of her early experiences.
She shared how her family's mindset viewed daughters as a burden, stating, “Parivaar ki saari sampatti ladke ko jaayegi, pote ko jaayegi (All the family’s wealth will go to the son, to the grandson). Ladkiyon ka kya hai? (What about the girls?) They will get married, they are a liability, ek bojh hai (they are a burden).”
Mallika Sherawat came to understand that her struggles were not unique. She expressed how initially feeling upset about her situation, she eventually recognized that many girls in her village faced similar discrimination and injustice. This realization ignited her determination to challenge societal expectations and break free from the constraints imposed on her and others.
The actress reflected on her upbringing, acknowledging that while her parents provided her with a solid education, they failed to foster an open mindset or offer her the freedom to explore her interests. She felt misunderstood and unsupported, particularly when it came to her passion for sports.
Despite her love for athletic activities, she had to pursue them in secret, as her family discouraged her, fearing that participating would make her appear too masculine and hinder her marriage prospects. This led to a myriad of restrictions that stifled her true self.
Following her standout role in Rajat Kapoor’s RK/RKay in 2022, Mallika Sherawat is making her comeback with Vicky Vidya Ka Woh Wala Video, co-starring Rajkummar Rao and Triptii Dimri. The film was released in theaters today, October 11, ushering in an exciting new chapter in her career.
Disclaimer: If you know someone who is having suicidal thoughts, anxiety, going through depression, or is suffering from a serious mental illness, reach out to a nearby doctor, mental health expert, or an NGO for immediate help. There are several helplines available for the same.
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