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8 Most funny Bollywood dialogues: Andaz Apna Apna’s Aya Hun Kuch To Leke Jaunga to Jab We Met’s Chillar nahi hai mere pass
Over the years, Bollywood has delivered some gem of movies with some really funny and memorable dialogues that have stayed with us even after so many years.
Most funny Bollywood dialogues include some of the most bone-tickling dialogues the industry has produced over the years. These hilarious dialogues are well-written and performed perfectly by the actors. Here is a curated and comprehensive list of some of the funniest dialogues from Bollywood across different films and years.
7 Most funny Bollywood dialogues that are hard to miss
1. Aaya Hun Kuch Toh Leke Jaunga (Andaz Apna Apna)
- Writer: Rajkumar Santoshi and Vinay Shukla
- Presented by: Shakti Kapoor
Shakti Kapoor plays the role of Crime Master Gogo in Andaz Apna Apna which is hands down one of the funniest villains Bollywood has to offer. At one point, he says: "Aaya hun kuch to leke jaunga, khaandaani chor hu main. Mogambo ka bhatija, crime master gogo (If I'm here, I'll take something. I come from a family of thieves and I'm Mogambo's nephew)." It's written well and Shakti's dialogue delivery and comic timing take it to another level.
2. Chillar nahi hai mere pass (Jab We Met)
- Writer: Imtiaz Ali
- Presented by: Kareena Kapoor
Kareena Kapoor delivers a performance of a lifetime as Geet in Jab We Met. She is a girl who is motor mouth but has a kind heart. In one sequence, she is left alone at a railway station at night and the station master starts giving her lessons about women's dignity. In response, she says: "Aap jo ye bolte hai, iske paise charge hain ya muft ka gyaan hai? Kyunki chillar nahi hai mere pass (do you charge money for your words or is it for free? Because I don't have coins)."
3. Wo main mast tel me fry karke kha gaya (Hera Pheri)
- Writer: Neeraj Vora
- Presented by: Paresh Rawal
Paresh Rawal's Baburao Ganpatrao Apte is easily one of the funniest characters to come out of Bollywood. After being irritated for a particular reason, he receives a wrong number where a man is inquiring about his fish. Baburao claps back in the funniest way by saying: "Woh main mast tel me fry karke kha gaya (That I fried in oil and ate it)."
4. Dost fail ho jaata hai to dukh hota hai (3 Idiots)
- Writer: Rajkumar Hirani and Abhijat Joshi
- Presented by: R. Madhavan
One of the funniest dialogues in Aamir Khan's 3 Idiot is, "Dost fail ho jaye, toh dukh hota hai. Lekin dost first aa jaye, to zyada dukh hota hai (It hurts when a friend fails, but it hurts even more when get come first)." This dialogue beautifully captures an emotion most of us have felt at some point in our school or college lives.
5. Agar shakal dekh ke shaadi hoti na... (Bareilly Ki Barfi)
- Writer: Nitesh Tiwari and Shreyas Jain
- Presented by: Rajkummar Rao
At one point in Bareilly Ki Barfi, Rajkummar Rao's character says: "Agar shakal dekh ke ladkiyan shaadi karti na toh Hindustan mein aadhe ladke kanware hote (Half of the men in India would be single if women married by only looking at their faces)." This dialogue struck a chord with the viewers and has remained very popular.
6. Tumko uthake museum me rakhna chahiye (Jab We Met)
- Writer: Imtiaz Ali
- Presented by: Shahid Kapoor
At one point in Jab We Met, Shahid Kapoor's character Aditya Kashyap realizes how different Geet is. He tells her that she belongs in a museum and people should buy tickets to see her. "Tumhe uthakar museum me rakhna chahiye. Ticket lagne chahiye tumhe dekhne ke liye." This dialogue explains how he sees her.
7. Ab pyaar na hua tumhara UPSC ka exam ho gaya (Raanjhanaa)
- Writer: Himanshu Sharma
- Presented by: Mohammed Zeeshan Ayyub
Mohammed Zeeshan Ayyub plays the role of a close friend of Dhanush's character in Raanjhanaa. As he notices that the hero's attempt to woo a girl is failing, he compares it to the UPSC exams. He says, "Ab pyaar na hua tumhara, UPSC ka exam ho gaya hai, dus saal se clear hi nahi ho raha hai (It seems like your love is like UPSC exams, you haven't been able to clear it for ten years)."
8. When I dead, police coming (Sholay)
- Writer: Salim-Javed
- Presented by: Dharmendra
Sholay remains one of the most iconic films in not just Bollywood but across the nation. The film, written by Salim-Javed, has several memorable scenes and dialogues that are part of our popular culture even after so many years. In one scene, Dharmendra's character fakes to jump from a water tank and gives a funny monologue of what will happen after his demise.
The dialogues are deliberately written in broken English and always manage to tickle our funny bones. He says, "When I dead, Police coming, police coming, Budiya going jail. In jail, budiya chakki pessing, and pessing, and pessing and pessing." Over the years, this dialogue has been immortalized thanks to its various copies.
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