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Cats Movie Review: Even cat lovers will despise this Francesca Hayward & Taylor Swift film
Cats Movie Review: Tom Hooper's fever dream of Cats: The Musical is so ambiguously bleak, it ends up as a huge cat-astrophe. For a musical that heavily capitalized on the popularity of Taylor Swift during its promotional rounds, the singer had more of a cameo appearance than a starring role.
Cats
Cats Cast: James Corden, Judi Dench, Jason Derulo, Idris Elba, Jennifer Hudson, Ian McKellen, Taylor Swift, Rebel Wilson, and Francesca Hayward.
Cats Director: Tom Hooper
Cats Stars: 1.5/5
Cats: The Musical is like a fever dream stemmed out of the mind of a cat enthusiast who was obviously influenced by recreational drugs! It's a unique suspension of disbelief that is so absurd, you tend to be left mesmerised. But it's also a creative product that must not be replicated! Obviously, Tom Hooper did not get the memo! Tom's rendition of Cats is so ambiguously bleak that right from the trailers, many predicted the fate of the highly ambitious film, which is a giant-sized cat-tatrosphe! (All the pun intended!)
For the unversed, Cats centers on an abandoned stray cat Victoria (Francesca Hayward) who is thrown into the dark, gloomy streets of London and encounters members of the Jellicle tribe. It's coincidental that Victoria ends up meeting said members on the night of the Jellicle Ball where one cat will be granted passage to the Heaviside Layer, to embark on a new life of their choice. The decision lies in the hands of the Jellicle leader Old Deuteronomy (Dame Judi Dench). However, trouble also comes sniffing in the form of Macavity (Idris Elba), who tempts many Jellicle members to shift to the dark side.
The common complaint when the trailer of Cats released is why use CGI fur when you are using live performers, that too veterans like Judi Dench and Ian Mckellan. What made Cats such an iconic yet controversial musical is its absurdity but the biggest mistake Tom Hooper did with the movie adaptation is to try to class it up by a 100. The combination of the CGI with real-life is so sublime, its aesthetic is like the perpendicular tails of the cats; truly frightening. On the other hand, the cat movements make absolutely no sense! We have Victoria strutting like a Victoria's Secret Model, while the entire tribe thrives on acrobatic and sensual choreography. You have Taylor Swift's character Bombalurina in heels, while Idris Elba is the ugliest cat-human avatar, I can't erase from my "memory." What distracts you further is the human hands these cats are equipped with that's just way too much to endure at one go.
Francesca, who is a trained ballet dancer, tries to muster up her genuine talent throughout the film but fails because of her one-toned curious expression that just feels repetitive within the first 10 minutes. Idris was obviously told to overperform the hell out of Macavity and fails untimely. Taylor almost feels like she was playing herself in the minimal screen offering, which would definitely upset Swifties! The starring role felt more like a brief forgettable cameo. Jennifer Hudson may have given us goosebumps with her rendition of And I Am Telling You I'm Not Going from Dream Girls but fails to leave a memory when recreating the most iconic Cats track, Memory. In fact, it's Beautiful Ghosts by Francesca, that's the saving grace of the musical, which is filled with one dance number after another. Judi Dench is truly the equivalent of Mufasa from The Lion King and inspite of owning the best scenes, fails to make a mark thanks to her gobsmackingly hideous getup. On the other hand, theatre veteran Sir Ian McKellan is aptly cast as Gus The Theatre and it's his multiple "meows" that will leave you giggling like a fresh of breath air. James Corden and Rebel Wilson are stationed as the comedy elements with cringeworthy dialogues like "Cat's got your tongue?" and "Look who the cat dragged out!"
Laurie Davidson as Mr. Mistoffelees and Robbie Fairchild as Munkustrap salvage what little dignity these actors have as cats and help add a little catnip to an otherwise dull dish. Tom uses many cat metaphors to overtake the streets of London city which includes Catsino and The Milk Bar, while cat lovers all around the world will want to collectively cringe with how overboard this film truly goes to stay true to its moniker.
Towards the end of the 1 hour and 39 minutes, we have Old Deuteronomy breaking the fourth wall singing how one should not undermine a cat. However, all we can say with deep grief after watching this Tom Hooper debacle is, "Oh, Cats!"
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