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How to Get Him to Propose: 15 Ways to Take the Relation to the Next Level
Are you waiting to take your relationship to the next level and make it official? Here is a guide on how to get him to propose!
Being in a serious relationship for years and wanting your man to propose to you to take things to the next level is quite common. But when you don’t see your man making any effort to make the relationship official, you might start doubting your partner. Perhaps you might also start thinking he isn’t serious about you.
This is when you would want to know some tips on how to get him to propose and take your relationship to another level. In a relationship, when a partner isn’t proposing, it might lead the other person to think that they are not serious about their bond. But let us tell you that that’s not always the case.
Maybe your man wishes to take things slow or is unsure if you are ready for marriage. Or maybe he is so content in the relationship and the way things are that he doesn’t feel the need to change anything.
The reason could be any — and of course, the answer to how to make him propose could be different for different people. There is no one-size-fits-all, but there are some subtle ways that you can try to let your man know you are serious about this relationship and want to be with him forever.
“Not everyone places the same value on marriage,” says Amanda Leigh Doueihi, a relationship coach. “If your partner has not proposed, and you don't think it's going to happen soon, take some time to have a conversation with them. Ask them whether they see marriage in their future and how they feel about making that commitment to you.”
“I strongly suggest you go into this conversation with an open heart and mind and really listen to what your partner has to say. Perhaps there are financial reasons that are holding them back from proposing, or they need more time before they commit to marriage. If you and your partner are not aligned on where the relationship is heading, then it's an opportunity for you both to re-evaluate the relationship.”
In this article, we are going to get into the nitty gritty of a relationship and share with you some of the best ways to make your man propose to you. Let’s get started!
How to Get Him to Propose: 15 Subtle Ways to Try
1. Drop Subtle Hints
If your boyfriend has no clue that you want to be proposed, you can drop subtle hints to make him understand what you want out of the relationship. For instance, plan to watch together a movie in which there is a beautiful proposal scene, and then say things like “I want to be proposed this way”, or “This is so beautiful, I can’t wait for you to propose to me like this.” Or if you both love music, share songs with him that talk about love, romance, and proposal. You can even tag him in love or marriage quotes to drop hints here and there before diving straight into the topic. “I always encourage people to be very open about what they are looking for in their relationship. Dropping hints is not the most mature way to get your needs met in a relationship,” adds Doueihi.
“The best thing to do is set up time to have relationship check-ins. Both people want to feel safe to be heard and to be able to express their desires. If you want your partner to propose to you, have a conversation with them about where you see the relationship heading, a timeline you have in mind about taking the next step, and then listen to how your partner feels.” They might be on the same page as you, or they might need a few other things to happen before they feel ready to take the next step.”
2. Be Independent
Most people don’t like it when their partners act clingy. After all, nobody wants to feel suffocated in a relationship, and in various cases, this is a major reason why men pull away and don’t think about proposing. Being independent and responsible can make your man feel that you are a perfect wife material and getting married to you would be the right thing to do. In this case, you should give space to yourself, hang out with your friends, do chores on your own, and be responsible to take some burden off his shoulders and let him know that he can trust you with his life.
3. Appreciate Him
Contrary to what many people believe, men too, just like women love being appreciated and pampered. No matter how fierce and independent you are, in a committed relationship, you need to work as a team and let the other person know that you need them as well. Thank him for the little things he does for you and tell him what he means to you. You can create some special memories by jotting down your feelings on a piece of paper and putting it under his pillow — this will surely brighten up his day and make him feel adored. These little gestures go a long way in strengthening a healthy relationship and moving things forward.
4. Tell Him About Your Dream Proposal
If there’s a particular way that you wish to be proposed, tell it to him. Now, there’s a way to bring this topic up — don’t just start talking about it all of a sudden or else it might scare him off. You might drop cues here and there. For instance, when going shopping, you can randomly tell him what kind of dress you would want to wear when getting proposed to or what kind of a ring would you want. Again, it’s advisable to not set your expectations too high, or else that might put your man off — remember, it’s not about how you are being proposed, but the love and thought your man put behind it matters. So do tell him about the way you want to be proposed, but don’t make it extravaganza lest you want the pressure to drive him away.
5. Be There for Him
When a man loves someone, all he wants is for his partner to be there with him through thick and thin. Tell him you love him and that no matter what, he has got your back always. Support him, lend him an ear whenever he wants to talk, and appreciate the little gestures he makes for you. Doing this will strengthen his belief in the power of love and this might make your dream proposal come true.
6. Be a Good Listener
Sometimes men also try giving subtle hints as to why they are pushing the thought of marriage away. Maybe they are scared of the responsibilities that come along with marriage, or maybe they are not sure if you want the same thing — if your man tries to talk to you about his fears and insecurities, talk to him keeping any judgment aside. Have an active communication with him and listen to whatever he has to say. This might help you understand why is he not proposing to you and could also help you plan a further course of action to make him believe in the institution of marriage.
7. Build a Bond with His Family
Marriage is just not a union of two people, it’s also a union of two families. Everyone has a high regard for their families in their hearts — so to get your man to propose to you, start building a sweet and genuine bond with his family members. Talk to his family members, meet them, or invite them to your place — get close to them to show your man you are whole-heartedly invested in the relationship and that family is your priority. Once his family gets to know you, they might ask him to get down on his knees and propose to you.
8. Pay Attention to Yourself
When we get into a relationship, everything is about “Us” instead of “I.” Many times, we get so busy taking care of our partners that we forget to prioritize ourselves and our needs. It doesn’t matter if you’ve been dating for months or years — do not stop taking care of yourself. By this, we don’t mean that you must wear a lot of makeup or fancy clothes always. But don’t get too ‘comfortable’ and eat healthy, exercise, and focus on your goals to keep your man enticed. This will also indicate that outside of the relationship, you have a life of your own and are independent in every way possible. And trust us, being independent is a trait that’s always appreciated.
9. Plan a Trip with Him
In our day-to-day hectic lives, many times we are bombarded with so many activities that we don’t get time to think about anything except work. If you feel that your man is serious about you but is not able to think about marriage because of a busy schedule, know it’s time to break the monotony and plan a surprise getaway to unwind. You can go to a place he’s been planning to visit or you can also evoke romance by visiting the place you went for the first time as a couple. The beautiful scenery, ambiance, and long chats, when you two are alone, will bring back the spark in your relationship and might get him to propose to you.
10. Attend Weddings Together
The ambiance of a wedding is such that it can make anyone’s heart flutter and make them want to get married. So go to wedding ceremonies together and feel the vibes — the way people dance their hearts out, say their marriage vows and have fun will make your man’s heart melt. Plus, he’ll see that the wedding day can be so beautiful and it might make him prepare for a marriage proposal.
11. Watch Romantic Movies Together
As a huge fan of Friends, I cry every time I watch the episode where Monica proposes to Chandler. This is because the scene is created so beautifully that it can induce the feelings of romance easily. This is just an example of how to get him to propose — if you both are into watching movies, then you can plan a romantic night by choosing to watch a movie together and maybe bring the topic of marriage subtly in between.
12. Surround Yourself with Married Friends
Getting cold feet right before marriage is a common thing that happens to a lot of people. Marriage although is a beautiful institution that unites two people, can sometimes scare people off. No matter how much in love your partner is with you, if they have a negative connotation to marriage, chances are that is the reason why he isn’t proposing to you. If that’s the case, patience is the key to resolving this fear.
If you have married friends, you can both hang out with them — talking to a married couple, and sharing a few laughs with them might put your man at ease and make him realize that marriage is indeed precious. He might also see what he is missing out on by not proposing to you, and that could make him take the big leap you’ve been desiring.
13. Discuss About the Future
As we said above, there’s no one answer to “how to get him to propose”, the reason why is your partner not proposing could be anything. Sometimes, men don’t even know what their partners want — blame it on lack of effective communication or understanding, but if that’s the case with you, it’s high time you start discussing the future. This will give him a cue that you envision a future with him.
When discussing about future, you can talk about how you want your married life to be, whether you want kids or not, your parenting style, goals, where you want to settle, etc. Also, when talking about the future, don’t make it all about yourself — ask him about his preferences as well. This will keep him engaged in the conversation and is one of the most genius ways to get him to propose to you.
14. Act Cold And Distant
This might be the last resort, but if you feel like you’ve been trying to do everything to get your man to propose to you, but all your efforts have gone in vain, then you can try this trick. Cut off communication for a while and act aloof and distant — tell him that you want some time alone and ask him not to bother you. Play ‘hard to get’ and make him understand that he cannot take you for granted. Show him how his world would like him without him and that might get him to get a ring for you.
15. Talk to Him Directly
So far we have told you the subtle tips on ‘how to get him to propose’ but if those don’t work for you, then it’s perfectly okay to have a direct conversation with your partner. You can simply ask him about where this relationship is going and what he plans to do in the future. Tell him that you intend on being his life partner and if he is ready for that. However, while doing so, don’t sound impatient or desperate, and don’t force him to make any decision. It’s best to just tell him that you plan on spending a lifetime together and then let him take his call.
Conclusion
‘How to get him to propose’ is indeed a tricky question, but once you understand the reason why is he backing out of the proposal, you can use it to your advantage and make him kneel to ask your hand. But even if you don’t know the exact reason, we are sure our list will help you to get your man to propose to you. Just ensure not to use all the ways all at once and try one thing at a time. Also, be patient and let time run its course of action. In matters of hearts, love always wins — where’s there love, there’s peace and happiness. So keep dropping subtle hints to the apple of your eye and it will for sure make him wanna ask for your hand. But if he isn’t ready for marriage, be receptive to that too.
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