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20+ Relationship Rules to Swear by for a Happy Love Life
From being honest to giving each other space, here are some relationship rules that can help a couple grow together and make their relationship meaningful.
While living by the adage, “My life, my rules” can help you foster a sense of independence when you are single, following it adamantly all the time in a committed relationship can be a recipe for disaster. Being in a committed relationship does require a couple to set some healthy “rules” for themselves. One can’t simply think they can do anything they want once they hold someone’s hands and decide to walk with them through highs and lows. As old-school as it may sound, setting healthy relationship rules can help a couple grow together while also retaining mutual trust and understanding.
Many times, people feel suffocated to the point of feeling that someone is choking on their necks when they are asked to have some terms and conditions for a relationship. But truth be told, love in a relationship can take a backseat if love partners don’t abide by certain rules that are necessary to keep a relationship strong. Truth, respect, loyalty, and effective communication are some basic parameters that make a relationship as good as the love stories we see in movies. But what are these rules exactly that help a relationship thrive? Let’s dive deeper into our relationship guide and strengthen your bond with your boo.
Relationship Rules for Couples to Abide by
1. Make Time for Each Other
This is such a simple rule yet after reaching a certain point in a relationship, when the sparks start fading, couples find it different to spend quality time. When people are hit by responsibilities, they start making more time for their work and other commitments instead of their relationships. This results in having less meaningful conversations with each other.
However, no matter how busy you are, you should try to make time for your partner. The number of hours you get to spend with each other won’t matter if you make that time meaningful. Even if you get one hour with each other daily, you can go for a walk, or a long drive, play some games together, or simply sit and talk about each other’s day.
Long-distance couples can choose to set some time when they voice/video call each other and spend some cute moments. As said above, quality is more important than quantity when it comes to spending quality time as a couple. Whenever you get time, cater to your personal commitment to your beau and make memories together.
Conversely, making yourself too available for your partner to the extent that you don’t find any time for yourself or your hobbies can be bad news for your mental health, too. So, make sure to spend quality time together, while also having an identity outside the relationship, which brings us to our next point:
2. Give Each Other Space
Too much of “We” in a relationship can make a couple feel smothered. Sure, various decisions are meant to be taken together for a couple, plus, being there for each other is important too. But if you feel that everything has transformed from “I” to “We” after you have started a relationship, it’s time to do some serious thinking, lest you want to clobber your goals and visions.
To build a meaningful relationship that stands the test of time, it’s crucial to give each other space. Everyone has hobbies and goals — let your partner enjoy his/her “Me-time,” and give some time to yourself, too. This will help you both build yourselves while also building the relationship.
3. Be Loyal
Loyalty and a happy relationship are the two sides of the same coin. Both can’t survive without each other (unless it’s an open relationship). This is tricky because the parameters of loyalty can be subjective.
Some don’t like their partners being friends with their exes and may perceive that as disloyalty. Others have a freer outlook and don’t consider anything as “cheating” unless their partner is in a full-fledged relationship with someone else.
Rules for loyalty could definitely differ from couple to couple, so it’s important for both partners to define what “loyalty” means to them. It’s important to set these rules in the initial stage of dating and prevent chaos, heartbreak, and the whirlwind of negative emotions that arise when a couple is suspicious of each other.
Having said that, if you feel that your partner is going overboard with the rules, you should state your concerns clearly. While possessiveness is a trait that can’t escape the world of a relationship, too much of it can only cause jeopardy.
If for your partner, loyalty is about spending all the time with you and not having any communication with others, this raises a huge concern. If you have similar concerns with your partner, it’s time to introspect and set healthy boundaries to avoid negativity in the relationship.
4. Express Your Love
While love in movies most often seems like a couple is living in a La La Land, in reality, striking the right chord in your boo’s heart could be difficult — especially if you are bad at expressing your feelings.
But by practicing simple gestures like talking to each other, wishing each other good morning/good night, sending each other gifts randomly, and just being there for each other, you can easily reciprocate the love your partner provides to you and express your feelings.
On this note, we would also like to say that some couples are actually more of a “doer” than a “sayer.” They like professing their love in actions — they’ll take care of each other in sickness, support each other’s goals, and do many things that scream “I am in love with you.” The rule here is to make your partner know that they mean a lot to you — whether it’s through meaningful actions or loving words, it’s completely up to you.
5. Have Regular Communication
Relationships are delicate and can easily be wrecked with improper/minimal communication. One of the ground rules for a relationship is to have effective and regular communication with each other. This lets the other person know that you are thinking of them and also helps in growing together in love.
Whether you live together or are miles apart, you can always give a text or call your mate and have a heart-to-heart conversation. Even though you or your partner is busy, you can make a rule to spend a few minutes talking to each other — this will put you both at ease and not let work commitments or distance come in the way of true love.
6. Criticize, But Constructively
Even though your better half ticks all your boxes and is a complete package, with time, maybe you’ll realize that he has a few quirks that put you off. Maybe he has the habit of staying up late in bed, not putting the toilet seat down, or being messy — time will unfold every other characteristic trait/habit that’ll annoy you.
Yelling at your special one or arguing is never the way to handle such conflicts. Having open and honest communication where you tell him/her what things are bothering you could help you two arrive at a solution that could keep the relationship growing. So, couples can make it a rule to put forth each other’s mistakes and flaws without demeaning each other. This way, both of you would feel safe and not feel the need to put on a facade and have the urge to impress your partner by doing everything perfectly.
7. Learn to Take Criticism Well, Too
The above point goes both ways — if you familiarize your partner with their flaws and they take it well, you must abide by the same rule. If there’s something your significant other has pointed out and wants you to change to become a better version of yourself — don’t take it as a personal attack. Instead, retrospect on what they have said and try to mend your ways to keep the relationship thriving.
Having said that, everyone has flaws, and changing too much in a person would bring the entire personality down of a person. While trying to become the best version of yourself is great, changing every little thing that you find wrong in your partner can bring your relationship down. And this brings us to our next point:
8. Embrace Each Other’s Flaws
Perfection is a myth! As much as you would want your partner to strive for perfection, it’s a dream far from reality. Plus, there is a sense of serenity in being imperfect — after all, this ain’t an ideal world we are living in.
So, you can ask your partner to change their bad habits and make it a rule not to overburden them to change everything in them. That would also change the person you fell in love with, and of course, you wouldn’t want that.
Maybe your partner likes to have their morning tea in bed and you hate it — this is a small thing that needs not be changed. In fact, you too can join him/her for tea, and join in your beloved’s habits (even if you find that habit messy!)
9. Don't Make a Mountain of a Molehill
Human brains are complex. Sometimes, an issue is trivial but our overthinking attitude makes it seem like a huge concern. In relationships, too, it happens that a petty disagreement becomes a huge fight. Result? A spoiled day!
One of the most pivotal requirements for a relationship to last long is to not let small arguments become a matter of huge concern. If you’ve been hurt by your partner, talk it out with him/her in an amicable way. Small mistakes are to be forgotten and forgiven — ask your beloved to do the same if you’ve made a mistake.
Plus, don’t bring past mistakes in a current fight, otherwise, you’ll both catch yourself in a cyclone of past issues that don’t even concern you anymore, which paves the way for our next point:
10. Let Bygones Be Bygones
In continuation to the above point, mistakes happen — talk it out with your partner, make a promise that it won’t happen again, and let it be done and dusted then and there! Don’t let your mind mull over what has happened in the past and make it a rule to not bring up issues that cropped up between you two ages ago. Once a mistake has been forgiven, leave it be!
11. Respect Each Other's Families And Social Circle
Maybe both of you come from different cultures due to which sometimes you feel not part of your partner’s family. No matter what the case is, unless anyone from your significant other’s side is toxic, there is absolutely no need for drama. One of the basis of a strong relationship is to have the utmost respect not just for one another but also for each other friends, families, and relatives.
Being rude to your partner’s loved ones can hurt them to the core and bring negativity to your relationship. If there’s something that bothers you about your their close ones, you can talk it out and express your concern. Any genuine concern should be sorted out amicably without hurting each other’s intentions. After all, respect goes both ways.
12. Discuss Important Matters
When was the last time you sat down as a couple and talked about the ways to manage finances? Maybe you have just entered a relationship or have been dating for years or maybe you are married — whatever the situation be, it’s important for a couple in a committed relationship to express their views over important things like finances, career goals, where they want to settle down, having kids, etc.
After all, the honeymoon phase fazes out quickly, and then when you come out of that stage, you hit ground reality. Hence, to avoid big arguments over trivial things that could become big after some time, make it a rule to discuss pivotal matters. This will not only help you understand each other better but also put you both on the same page for significant things in life.
Read More: 17 Signs of a Healthy Relationship (And Potential Red Flags)
13. Don't Be Stern About Gender Roles
This is 2024 and the world is rapidly evolving — women can be the sole breadwinner of the house, men can take care of the home, or vice versa, they can even work together and fulfill their goals. Healthy relationship rules are all about equality and respecting one another.
Don’t let others dictate your life and let the aged gender rules destroy the beauty of your relationship. Promise each other to be supportive and not let gender play a role in defining work for both of you. This means that there should be no “Men above women” or “Women above men” agenda in your dictionary. Even in a homosexual relationship, love should overpower all gender rules!
14. Be Honest
Lies and deceit should never be a part of a relationship, if they are, then the love story is bound to doom! When it comes to honesty, fidelity plays a big role in this! Love thrives at a place where a couple is honest with each other and in all honesty, stands with each other as a rock support. While harmless lies can aid in pampering your partner, saying lies all the time can make your boo turn away from the relationship. So be honest and whenever you have to give a few lie statements like, “No, you don’t look fat in that dress” — say these lies, all in good essence!
15. Don’t Say Unpleasant Things When Angry
Fights are a part and parcel of a couple’s lives — after all, some spice is needed once in a while to keep a relationship going. But anger doesn’t bring out the best in everyone, so even when fighting, maintain your calm and absolutely refrain from saying spiteful words that cut more than a knife!
Words that come out of our mouths can never find their way back in and even though we don’t mean them intentionally, saying malicious things can hurt our partners. So even if you are angry, don’t vent it out on your partner, and when fighting, don’t lose your temper.
16. Let Fights Happen Behind Closed Doors
As said above, fighting is normal for a couple, but make sure there is no scene created when you are having a disagreement. One of the most important relationship rules for couples to follow is to keep their exchanging blows within the four walls they are living in. Plus, fights should never turn ugly — monitor your temper, never ever abuse your partner, and try to sort out the issue in the most civil way possible.
17. Be Each Other’s Rock Support
There’s no relationship that can grow without both the partners supporting each other. This can’t really be set as a rule but is something that comes from within us — life is not always smooth and is a bumpy ride. Make sure to tag along with your partner whether the time is good or bad and be each other’s rock support.
18. Be Appreciative
Many times, in the hustle and bustle of daily life, we start taking a few things for granted. For instance, in a couple, if one is managing the finances and the other one the house, over a period of time, the couple might start thinking that it’s their “job” to do it. Little gestures like saying “Thank you” can go a long way in making each other feel appreciated.
For example, if your partner toils day and night to make both ends meet for you, don’t take the efforts for granted, thinking it’s their duty to do the same. A few positive lines like, “I know you work very hard to provide for us and I can’t thank you enough for this. Remember that I am always there for you and proud of you” can make your significant one’s day extra special.
Likewise, if one of the partners solely looks over the house, a positive statement like, “I adore how you take care of the little things of me and the house. I love you a lot and will always be by your side.”
In a nutshell, appreciate each other’s gestures and doings and see your relationship getting better and better every day.
19. Take Part in Your Partner’s Hobbies
Maybe he likes to read books and you are a party animal who loves going to dance parties. To keep boredom away and make your partner feel good, you can sometimes take part in your beloved’s hobbies and grow as a couple.
20. But Don't Forget to Be Active In Your Interests Too
A sense of individualism shouldn’t be lost if you are in a relationship. It’s great to make time for his hobbies, but at the same time, don’t forget the authentic you and take active participation in your hobbies and interests too. This way, you’ll keep growing as an individual and be happy.
21. Apologize If You Have Made a Mistake
This is a no-brainer relationship rule! If you have made a mistake, simply say sorry and try not to repeat the mistake.
22. Accept Your Partner's Apology
A relationship is a two-way street. If your partner has made a mistake, try to forgive him/her and make it a point not to bring past mistakes to the present date.
23. No Place for a Third Wheel in a Relationship
Everyone has a past and one can’t erase it but there’s also no need to sulk about the past, ruining what you have in the present. Say your partner is not comfortable with you being in touch with that toxic ex of yours — it’s your responsibility to make your special one feel secure and do the same. All in all, you should set a rule for both of you that no third person can come in the way of your relationship and jeopardize it. For this, you’ll need to be honest with your partner and have complete trust in one another.
That being said, in order to make your partner feel secure, don’t lose yourself. Once again, setting healthy and clear boundaries can help you avoid such conflicts.
Relationships require a couple to put in consistent efforts, dedication, and hard work to make it work. Despite that, some relationships fail, sometimes due to a lack of communication, dishonesty, fidelity, lack of space, and many more reasons. Making relationship rules and abiding by them from the heart can help a couple stay happy and have a fulfilling relationship. While all of these relationship rules might not work for all, as there’s no “One size fits all” in a relationship, choosing a few rules and setting healthy boundaries can help a couple grow together in a better way.
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