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Joakim Noah Blasts Frustrating and Invasive NBA Drug Testing Protocols: ‘D**k Watchers’
Joakim Noah criticizes the NBA's drug testing protocols, calling them frustrating and invasive. He argues that these measures impact players' lives and privacy. Read more.
Former Chicago Bulls center Joakim Noah explained the NBA's drug testing process, which randomly tests players. Speaking on the 'All The Smoke' show, Noah, who was once suspended for failing a drug test, discussed the league’s drug policy with former Golden State Warriors champion Matt Barnes. Both Noah and Barnes had been through the NBA’s testing before.
Noah shared, "You get p*ss tested all the time, with a guy watching you to make sure it’s really you peeing." He jokingly referred to these individuals as "d**k watchers."
Both Barnes and Noah laughed about how "weird" the experience was and agreed it was a job they wouldn't wish on anyone. Their humorous recount of the process echoed the oddity that players often experience when subjected to random drug tests.
One notable instance occurred in 2019 when Danny Green was tested after his highlight putback dunk off a LeBron James miss, which led to a lighthearted reaction. Fans are aware of these random tests, and while they can be disruptive, they sometimes bring about amusing responses from players.
Green gained recognition primarily for his defense and perimeter shooting, so witnessing him execute a slam dunk off a putback was quite unusual. Later, he announced on X that he was undergoing drug testing.
As the 2016-17 season neared its end, Joakim Noah struggled with an injury that kept him off the court. However, he still faced a doping test.
The league discovered Noah's violation of its anti-drug policy through that test, leading to a 20-game suspension. Since he was sidelined due to his injury, the league determined that his suspension would begin once he was eligible to play again.
In April of that year, reports indicated that Joakim Noah needed shoulder surgery due to a torn rotator cuff, but he was expected to be ready for training camp.
When the season commenced, fans saw little of Noah on the court. He made his debut on November 27, during the Knicks' matchup against the Portland Trail Blazers, playing just under three minutes and contributing two points, one rebound, and one block.
Joakim Noah played only seven games for the Knicks that season, averaging 1.7 points and 2.0 rebounds. The Knicks attempted but ultimately failed to negotiate a buyout with him before the 2018-19 season, resulting in his release. As a free agent, Noah signed with the Memphis Grizzlies in December 2018.
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