EXCLUSIVE: Urmila Matondkar opines on meaning of 'setting down'; 'It is the same for men and women'

Veteran actress Urmila Matondkar opened up on what 'settling down' means according to her. Read on to get some more details on the same.

Updated on Oct 15, 2023  |  07:20 PM IST |  279.9K
EXCLUSIVE: Urmila Matondkar opines on meaning of 'setting down'; 'It is the same for men and women'
Picture Courtesy: Urmila Matondkar Instagram
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As Navratri has finally begun, Pinkvilla exclusively spoke with Urmila Matondkar about being empowered herself and making a positive impact on society by empowering other women. During the interaction, Urmila Matondkar shared her opinion on the meaning of 'settling down'. She also shed light on how it is important for women to first understand themselves before having boyfriends or getting married as there is so much more in life to explore. 

Urmila Matondkar on the meaning of 'settling down' 

During an exclusive chat with Pinkvilla, Urmila Matondkar shared her thoughts on what she means by “settling down”. She said, “So, settling down first of all means settling down mentally. You know what you want, and it is the same I’m sorry for men and women both. I see a lot of men also not ready to get married or a lot of women also not ready to get married. Like, I used to find it growing up again a very weird thing that you know, I felt I have so much more to do with my life and coming from a basic middle-class family which had nothing to do with film industry dur dur tak. With being an actor toh kuch dimaag mein tha nahi toh please get that out of your mind ki kuch mujhe heroine banna tha ya aisa kuch tha, wo toh main ghar me bol bhi nahi sakti thi because mere ghar me koi tha hi nahi filmon se (being an actor wasn't even on my mind, so forget that I ever wanted to become a heroine or something like that, we couldn't even say this at home because there was no no from a film background)." 

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The actress mentioned that besides education, she felt she had more to achieve in life. Matondkar also emphasized that being in a relationship is not necessary for young girls to feel cool and happening.

The Rangeela actress further empathized on how it's important to explore our life and understand our true personality before committing to a relationship and then eventually moving towards marriage and children. She also talked about how today's world has become dependent on the internet since everything is available on social media.

In her advice to women, Matondkar continued, “Toh pehle apni personality ko toh nikhaaro aur samjho, phir boyfriends, this, that. I mean everything is just so aur kuch dikhta hi nai hai, aur kuch samajhta hi nai hai. Zindagi usse kayi badi hoti hai, but ye samajhne tak bohut der ho chuki hoti hai, toh na, not that me or anybody else telling them will help them but trust me girls, I mean yes, having boyfriend and eventually husband and children and all are great, but pehle apne aap ko samjho, kya karna hai wo samjho, who are you? Understand that first, what is it that you want? Earlier women didn’t have that choice, today they do. Today, their parents are understanding. I myself got married rather late in life because I respect the institute of marriage. Toh mujhe aisa lagta tha ki jab karni hai, jahan karni hai wo sochke aur sahi wajao se karni chahiye, na ki bhai ab toh ye umar hai, ab shaadi karo. Who told you?"

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Urmila Matondkar opines on how it should be the woman’s decision on having a child

Urmila also mentioned that it should always be the decision of a woman to have kids and if she is married the decision should be made between the couple together and people should respect and understand that. She said, “Even a choice of a woman of having children has to be left up to the woman. Let’s get it square and clear. There are many women who want to get married only so that they can have children, there are a lot of them who want children but don’t want to get married. But coming to the regular scene where the women are married, the decisions has to be of the couples together as to when they should have children."

The actress added, "A woman should have a child, this also should be her decision. And, first of all, let’s understand that it can be a decision not to have children of a couple together, or of a woman, it doesn’t have to be that there is anything physiologically wrong or right with a person. It can be taken for other reasons, so we have come to a point in life, where a society overall needs to understand these needs of the time."

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She continued, "They don’t have to be labelled as selfish, self-centered, what you call it…the ones who can’t conceive, the ones whatever, no, it can be a decision taken for certain reasons by certain couples that's it. So let’s understand the choices women are given today and women, it’s your chance to make the most of it, so don’t miss out on that."

Urmila Matondkar known for films like Rangeela, Ek Haseena Thi, Kaun, Pinjar, among others was last seen in the series titled Tiwari. 

ALSO READ: EXCLUSIVE: Urmila Matondkar discusses pay disparity in industry; ‘Shouldn’t be looked from one perspective’

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